This is a categorized guide on how, when and what to consider before dating, choosing a life partner and tips on how to maintain your relationship..
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Some of the unanswered questions about relationship, tend to frustrate some of the growing relationship between two loved ones..
Practically, certain steps and guides has to be implemented in order to ensure a long lasting relationship..
Have you been asking yourself about how to make your relationship a healthy one? If yes just sit down and read this post, hopefully it can solve your problem..
The steps and categories below tend to help people with different relationship problems.. A friend who was a victim of circumstance asked me, Victor; I am tired of my relationship, well that sounds quite straight and painful.
Now what could be the reason of being tired of your relationship, simply because you fail to do certain things you ought to do, maybe by not showing you love him or her.; or by ignoring some primary aspects which ought to be carried out properly..
With this categorized article, you will find out more about how to maintain a healthy relationship, things to do or say to him or her to show you care, whether dating is important before choosing a life partner- (if you are looking for one) and more importantly> tips and the things to consider before choosing a life partner..
Is dating really important before choosing a life partner?
A good guide on how to date for a purpose..
This question is being asked by so many people who want to choose a life partner
Before we get into the real deal, I wish to let you know whether it is properly recommended to date before marriage, and what you must know in order to achieve your aim of getting a life partner suitable for you .
Nowadays, people must date before marriage, which is good and misses to clearly point out the reason of dating before marriage.
The reasons of dating before marriage are as listed below.
Finding the right partner suitable for you in today’s age seems to be a complicating task, in the sense that some people’s mind are made up that such good partners are rarely found.
Dating give you an opportunity in a relationship to simply and religiously select the right partner suitable for you.
Some men and women think that dating for marriage is just to show love, have sex and others. But they got it all wrong.
Dating can do more than that!!
Dating and finding the right partner in your life – there are various steps to follow to ensure success on your mission.
Dating in a relationship can give you the right partner, only if you dated for that particular purpose.
Precisely, getting a nice partner suitable for you, is said to be an expectation of a good and healthy relationship /family ahead.
As we continue, I believe you will be able to point out the things to consider while dating and choosing a life partner.
Dating gives you the opportunity to determine the character of your partner.
Character is also one of the things to consider while dating.
A partner with a good character is likely to sustain a marriage, in the sense that he/she will always find the right action to take while encountering family problems.
Not only that, a well mannered partner seems to know how to approach one another in a respectful way, thereby giving “peace” the right to rule.
A partner with a good and reputable character can change the other partner to relent on many things which may be harmful to the family.
It always advisable to choose a partner with a good and reputable character. In order to ensure a long lasting marriage.
Choosing a generous life partner after dating, is highly recommended in marriages.
A generous partner is the person who is always available to help, when there is a problem in the family.
It may be giving a helping hand to the other with helpful advises.
A generous partner will always find it to be a privilege to offer money and other valuable things, in order to solve family problems.
Generosity must be considered while dating because it is one of the quality that determines the growth and development of the family.
3) Avoiding pretentious lovers.
Dating gives you the knowledge to figure out true lovers or the pretentious types.
Pretentious lovers can be defined as the person who always show fake love in order to achieve a secondary goal.
I have a friend (a boy), who is dating with a girl. Who later proposed to her.
I advised him, before he continues with the marriage, he should study the girl properly.
He took my words, and studied the relationship.
Not quite a week after my advice, he came to me weeping that the person, her lover, is another man’s love.
I asked, how? He said that as he was investigating, he found out that her wife to be, is in a relationship with another man.
He continued to narrate his experiences so far that a friend of hers revealed everything to him.
That she planned the marriage to be on contract.
On hearing the discussion between her and the intruder, says her friend. That her friends intention is to have the Supreme power to control her husband Company, which will later be sold out!!
It very important to know how genuine your partners love is , before proposing or accepting proposals. Take note, carrying on with the marriage, will be extremely disastrous, which will certainly lead to divorce.
Having heard this 3 important advice, I believe you will be able to choose wisely in order to avoid regrets.
Having listed the above, let’s look at the 10 things to consider before choosing a life partner..
There are considerable aspect, which you must consider before taking a step to ensure a proper dense good environment that can help you enjoy your marriage without divorce..
These are some raw facts you must consider while choosing a life partner.
Before you choose a life partner, there are some things you’ll consider before going ahead with it.
They are, as listed below.
This is one of the important
aspect you must consider before choosing a life partner.
In the world at large, religion seems to be one of the most respected tradition on earth.
Considering the fact that it has a strong abiding laws in it.
Before choosing a life partner, you
must first know his/her religious belief, and the way he/she abide by its laws and their requirements.
From the word “Life partner” it is simply a partner for a whole life time, no addition no subtraction and precisely you must surely share the same religion after marriage.
Some of the divorce that happen these days are as a result of unfamiliar religious beliefs.
For example, a man who is a Muslim came to ask a Christian woman for her hand in marriage.
This is one of the reoccurring event that we see in this world and are quite confused while encountering them. But if it is a Christian marrying a Christian, they will understand themselves more!!
But if it is Muslim marrying a Christian, one has to give up their religion, which is rare and difficult.
So before choosing a life partner, you must consider his/her religious belief before going on with the marriage or else you may find it quite dangerous to continue with it. Which may lead to divorce.
So it is quite advisable to choose the religion that will suit you .
The strength of your love, is one of the factor to consider while choosing a life partner.
Let me say, it is one of the factor that determines how long a marriage can last.
In a relationship, one must consider this before marriage, the type of love his/her partner share.
There is something called fake love.
Fake love can be defined as a pretentious attitude of displaying fake feelings in order to get a secondary result.
Secondary results can be your money, property, company and power, etc.
While primary results are, building a good and reliable family, caring for peers and executing your proper role in the family.
You must surely select carefully.
Because a mistake, can turn down a family.
If you choose a partner who displays fake love then you will have yourself to blame. Remember, as you make your bed, so you will lie on it.
3) Social status.
Social status is also important while choosing a life partner.
A life partner who has experiences, is likely to handle more family problems than the inexperienced one.
A partner with a high social status will be the type, that will take your family to a greater height. It is highly recommended, never forget this.
4) Their past.
This is also important before choosing a life partner.
Their past really matters a lot, in the sense that, any mistakes of not discovering your partners past life can lead to a total breakdown of your marriage.
Things to consider in their past lives are: the kind of life they have lived in the past.. Remember, if they lived a disgusting life in their past, such can also be applicable in your marriage. So look into it.
Another thing to consider is, the kind of relationship they have been into.
In some marriages, people never tried to know the kind of relationship their partner is into before marriage. And this mistake can lead you, to marry a divorcee or another person’s partner. Be cautious of this.
This is one of the factors you must consider before choosing your partner.
Weaknesses varies, for example.. If you are a woman, from your observations, observed the weakness of his partner to be looking out for other girls and chasing them while you are around. It is advisable not to continue with the marriage, because that procedure he is using before can also be applicable to your upcoming marriage.
And that will lead to a fatal fall of the marriage.
6) Family background.
This is a very serious factor, and must be considered before choosing a life partner.
In Africa, based on their culture and tradition, it is highly recommended to be extremely careful on this matter.
Some partners went ahead with their marriage without considering the background.
Family background teaches you many things about your partner,
believe me, a healthy and good family background can assure you great success in your marriage.
Why don’t you ask questions about your partner from neighbors and people indirectly. Their sincere response can give you an idea of what your partner looks like.
Don’t dare to ignore this important factor because a mistake may be dangerous in your entire life.
7) Health status.
This is very important before choosing a life partner.
Before choosing a life partner, you must surely know his/her health status. This is highly recommended for proper family organization and growth.
Before your marriage, simply ask for his/her medical results both from the past and present.
But it is advisable to accompany him/her to the laboratory/hospital.
Firstly, go for a pregnancy test.
If she is a lady, it is advisable to go to a pregnancy test, in order to know her status, if not, you may find it quite surprising that your child is another man property.
I repeat, it is a must!!
Secondly, genotype, blood group etc.
This is highly recommended before thinking about marriage.
Knowing the above mentioned of your life partner will go a long way to ensure that your family is safe and secured medically.
For example, if an SS carrier, marries an SS or AS individual. There is a probability that many of their offspring will be sickle cell victims. So be careful.
8) Sense of reasoning.
This factor is highly valued in marriages which must be considered while choosing a life partner.
The IQ of your partner will go a long way to narrate how your partner react with difficult problems and the how it can be resolved.
Considering a partner with a good or high IQ, is highly recommended. Because a partner with a high IQ seems to solve more family problems and tends to give more reasonable and valuable advice for the growth and development of the family.
So, it is highly recommended for us to choose wisely.
This is also one of the factors you may consider before choosing a life partner.
There is quite a different between an educated partner and an illiterate.
Education exposes you to different categories of life, and gives you clear hint on the availability of skills acquired for its right use.
An educated partner, tend to improve the family due to its exposure and constant implementation of the acquired skills.
While the uneducated tend to depend on the traditionally gotten skills, which may not be enough for the growth and development of the family.
It is left for you to choose, but choose wisely.
Character is also one of the factors to be considered before choosing a life partner.
Character is simply defined as the behavioral activities of an individual or thing.
Knowing your partners character is very important and any mistake in choosing a partner with an outrageous behavior/character, can lead to regrets.
For example, your partner always come back late in the night.
Your question will be… Can I cope with this type of character. .? If yes, you can go on with your wedding.
But if no,don’t dare to continue, because that particular character can make you loose your marriage because he/she can not carry out their specific duties in the family.
So be aware of this.
Having listed the above, the problem may not be knowing and searching for the right partner suitable for, it may be how to maintain the relationship..
Let’s look into this subject matter- how to maintain a healthy relationship..
Of course, many families and relationships fail because of lack of maintenance, whereas they got the right partner suitable for them..
Problems can come up in a relationship, which if not properly settled can lead to breakup.
These tips will help you know, keep and maintain your partner no matter what..
These are some of the tips that will help you to maintain a healthy and happy relationship.
Ensure that you follow all the tips in order to actualize this experiment.
1) Show your love.
Love without evidence is considered to be inappropriate in any relationship..
Therefore, do everything
possible to always show your love to your partner in whatever way you can.
You can do that for example, by somehow buying him/her favourite stuff you know him/her will appreciate. You can also help her with some of the house chores, maybe helping her to wash dishes and some other kitchen works.
You know women appreciates a man who always help with some kitchen work and it is somehow romantic.. So never miss that one!.
2) Learn to forgive.
In a relationship/marriage, what causes breakup/divorce can be as a result of the past errors which seems hard to forgive..
Forgiveness is very important in any, relationship/marriage, which is said to be one of the top secret of a successful relationship/marriage.
If you are being offended by your partner don’t always expect an apology before you forgive, because sometimes your partner may not know when he/she has offended you.
What you have to do is to meet him/her and express your feelings about the past incidents that took place.. Believe me the problem will be resolved. Remember this, you can prevent 70% of the problems which may lead to breakup/divorce through forgiveness.
3) Always express your feelings.
This is also a very important tip to maintain your relationship/marriage..
In a relationship, expression matters a lot. You must express your feelings about something you are not comfortable with by humbly narrating that particular thing at once, immediately after the incident or later depending on the gravity of the problem.
When you meet him/her, gently tell him/her your about what he/she did. But before you do so, In order to avoid more problems, humbly call him/her the sweet names; which he/she loves.. By so doing you are dragging him/her to reflect on the past love shared together, and believe me..
You are making your partner heart to be at peace with you and at that point you narrate your feelings to him/her. The problem will be resolved.. It will even help you guys to understand one another which will promote peace and longer relationship/marriage.
4) Learn to appreciate.
Appreciation is also one of the helpful tips to maintain a healthy relationship..
Appreciating someone’s efforts in a relationship can benefit greatly.. If you are shown a little favour don’t take it like; It has to be that because we are bound to help each other.
Yes it is true but always say thank you to any kind of favor/help rendered to you.
By so doing you are promoting a long lasting relationship.
Respect is one of the primary aspect in a relationship, if don’t respect your partner then you prepare to lose the relationship /marriage. For example, if your partner raises a suggestion in a matter.. You did not even want to look into the suggestions you just bluntly refuse it, due to lack of respect. That action alone can make your partner to put an end to that relationship.
Respect in a relationship is very important and it one of the key that holds a relationship.
Remember, when you respect your partner, you are just giving him/her a sense of belonging and you are proving your love to him/her in that way. Believe me he/she will like to do the same for you.. And by so doing, your love will be growing everyday.
Now, if you have already done the mistake of disrespecting your partner, what you have to do is to ask for forgiveness.. And amend your ways to ensure you meet up with it. Then the problem will be resolved.
Trust in a relationship is one of the big problem we encounter in a relationship. Let me say that, it is even the key that determines how long a relationship/marriage can last.
Let us think about this, how can partners hold a longer relationship when there is no trust? Impossible! Trust is said to be the engine house of every relationship/marriage, without it there will be no lasting relationship.
A man came to me and narrated his problems, saying that his wife did not trust him not even once.
He came to me for help but he was surprised at the answers I gave to him. I told him after he has finished his explanation that he is the cause of that problem, he said how..? I said, your wife did not trust you because you have not gained her trust.
He said how? I said to obtain trust from someone is very easy, what you have to do is to keep your words.
In a relationship to obtain trust from your partner you must ensure to keep at least 80% of your words, and it worked for him.
By so doing you will not even know when your partner will start trusting you again. And believe me you have handled the problem which kept breaking down every relationship. GOOD LUCK!
7) Introduce new things.
Yes, this step is taken when you find out that your relationship is getting bored from time to time.
Remember, whenever you’re feeling bored about something, you may want to make new things happen, in order not to feel that. Nobody like things that makes them to be bored.
Feeling bored of a relationship, in the other hand is feeling tired of it.
Whenever your partner started feeling bored of a relationship, believe me.. There is a probability that the relationship may fail soon because if your partner feels bored of the relationship, it means that he/she is loosing interest in it.
Here are the things to do to avoid that.
Firstly, try to know the area that he/she is loosing interest at.
For example he/she no longer want to be going to the restaurant for lunch, try to introduce a homemade dish(The one that is prepared at home).
During the time of preparation, try your best to get involved in everything, on that process share lovely/funny stories which he/she likes.
Believe me the next day, he/she will like to have that kind of lovely moments again and again and again.
That will show you that he/she is no longer bored about that but interested to do more and more.
Secondly, if he/she loves partying.. And you have been restricting him/her from doing so.
Well I don’t blame your partner if he/she gets bored about this. You are to be blamed about this.
You may have a good reason for the restriction but can you sacrifice your relationship, just because you don’t want him/her to be going to party with friends, catching fun and other things? No you don’t dare!! Because the moment that leads to breakup, those things you are avoiding will surely happen and you will be the loser, Be wise!!
Allow him/her to be attending to parties occasionally, and you must go with her, depending on your level of trust.
Thirdly, add flavor to the relationship.
You can add flavor to your relationship in many ways.
Let’s look at this, adding flavor in a relationship comes in different forms. The way you addresses your partners demand and the way they react to it.
Well, surprising your partner with good gifts always will go a long way in flavoring the relationship.
But the question will be.. What kind of gift?
Well, the type of gift to buy depends on the one, who is receiving it, and his/her interest.
For example, if your partner loves fashion, then take note that buying him/her beautiful clothes can go along way.
What you need to do is to secretly observe his/her best color, size and shape.
Then go to the supermarket or any other place, and buy the clothes for him/her. And it must be a surprise gift. Give it to your partner. I bet you he/she will love you more than before.
Because you surprised him/her? not only that, but you even went ahead to observe his/her favorite color, shape and size?
This is really amazing indeed.
You can also spice up your relationship by sharing thoughts, maybe by sending love quotes which can be searched through search like Google , Yahoo search engine , or Bing . You can also find interesting quotes from any of the listed social media: Facebook ,Twitter etc. Which will make your relationship more interesting.
Having heard about things to do in order to maintain a relationship, let’s look at the things you have to do or implement do to make it a happy one.
Yes of course, if you are not happy in a relationship, things will fall out, everything will look boring..
Now, some of the narrated tips below help to take the lead in order to make your relationship a happy one..
Getting into a relationship is very easy but making that relationship work is not. Earlier days of relationship are wonderful but when you spend more time together then reality comes out.
There are so many new things that happens that you have never expected.
Gradually, when relationship grows you start expecting from each other. You demand time and space which you may not get. You also feel frustrated about the relationship.
But this is not the right attitude. In every relationship, there are some or other problems. You are needed to understand this fact and also know how to tackle them . If you wish to happy relationship then you must understand these given points.
Let go unrealistic expectations:-
Expecting a happily ever after love relationship is a folly. That exists only in movies or fairy tales. In real world, it is not possible to have problem free relationships. As soon as one understands this concept, he or she will never get upset with the issues.
Be kind and adjustive:-
In relationships, it happens that guy doesn’t like girl’s friends or family members and the same goes with the girl. In such situations, people find it difficult to adjust when they meet them. This unadjustive behaviour creates troubles in the relationship. So, make a change in your attitude and be kind to other’s friends and family.
Don’t compromise for wrong:-
Undoubtedly, you want your relationship to work in every situation. For that, you make boundless efforts and makes innumerable compromises. But this is not right. There should be limit of everything. You should not always accept that he or she is taking you for granted. White lies and making fun of you in public should not be accepted too.
Fights are not end of love:-
Just because you fight and argue a lot that does not mean you do not love each other. It is necessary to understand that every couple fights. So, if you two fight then this is nothing new. In fact, fights are needed to make your relationship more beautiful and bring you closer.
Just love is not sufficient:-
For the healthy relationship , just love is not enough. To make your relationship work, lots of things are required. There should be trust, respect, understanding, honesty and patience in both of you so that the relationship will not break in troubled times.
Having read the above mentioned, let’s look at the benefits of dating and being in a relationship(healthy)
Dating can be fun sometimes when meeting new people , going out to new places, feeling the excitement of a new relationship. But do you really enjoy it? It’s just not fun after a certain point.
But don’t you feel like settling down when you find that special someone. Many think that settling down or being in a relationship can be boring. But relationships don’t have to be boring! In fact, being in a relationship makes your life better!
Here are 7 reasons which make your life amazing being in a relationship.
1. Relationships can help to make us better people.
Often we have the energy to do things for others that we wouldn’t do for ourselves. Love is powerful in that way. If your partner brings out the best in you, he or she is a keeper.
2. Turning things around can be much easier than you think.
Usually, we are just being stubborn or resentful. Dropping your attitude and appreciating that your other half has been putting up with your sin can help to make you more understanding.
3. You feel happier.
There’s less stress, less depression, of course, you’re happier! There are even scientific studies that show married people being happier and living longer than their unmarried peers.
4. You learn to compromise.
In a relationship, you have to share. You share living space, dinner plans, and nights out with friends. You split holidays with families. You learn how to give a little and how to get a little. This makes you a better person because you’re showing your love, you’re showing your flexibility, and you’re showing that you care enough to work together.
5. Your world is expanded.
Being in a relationship means you get to hear about your partner’s interests. You’ll be exposed to new authors, musicians, and movies‒and you’ll already know they’re good! You’ll meet new family and hopefully become close with them.
6. Romance creates warmth, hope, and happiness.
The more you have, the more you enjoy your life . It sounds simple because it is.
7. Having a hand to hold as you go through life makes the difficulties easier to deal with.
When things go problematic, knowing that your mate has your back will allow you to go through whatever you have to and come out the other side a more positive person.
With these strong words, I am convinced that you will obtain success in your goals to maintain healthy, happy and long lasting relationship.
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